Shake-yo-ass-peare, Billy don't be a Hero...

I performed in a piece of highly regarded "Car-park Shakespeare" this summer. It rained a lot, a number of audience members tried to initiate dogging during my most chilling monologues perhaps in tribute to when Rupert Everett played the role. Or maybe because I played the entire role with my park turned on them and speaking in a hush....I'll never know. I'll tell you this: I left with a pocket full of broken dreams but with a new best friend: Bill Shakespeare.

The play incidentally was Much Ado About Nothing. The title was originally meant as a sarcastic riff on the little seen "Much Ado about Nuttin" - Christopher Marlowe's ill-advised foray into the Soft Porn/Hip Hop Musical Genre. Released in the early days of video, it was a victim of it's own pioneering spirit, as it was released on the ye olde Betamax format. We're talking 1983 here guys....It was rubbish by the way, you've missed nuttin. Ha ha...Coincidentally Snoop Dogg's more successful beats and booty effort "Doggystyle" was an adaptation of Billy No-Mates 'Twelfth Night' and was released in 1998 on Laser Disc. The video format of the future. Jazzed up a bit, the plot remained more or less the same as Bill's wacky comic book original, save for the bit where Viola pretends to be her brother Sebastian so she can get into the mens locker room at the castle and spy on their merry bits...... Anyway back to our play, , say what you like, but Shakespeare did not know his hardcore grot from his elbow and the whole she-bang was short of virtually any pornographic content at all unless you get yer rocks off to a nice piece of slippery when wet ye olde verse or pigs tits(don't we all?) But it was fun I'll say that, and in its memory here is a little video shot one afternoon in a horse box that sees us doing our best to pay tribute to the spirits of these wonkey old gents and their fuddy duddy-nonsense writing...